Monthly Archives: March 2011
TheKnot. My big Brother Derrick Van Dusen Is Engaged for later this year. Congratulations Bro.!!
Derrick Ive always looked up to you and aspired to be of some of your quality of person since I was a little kid. You were always good at everything, and just as confident while you did it. I love that about you. I love the sincerity, the passionate committment, and the diligence you apply toward everything you do and I Think Amanda will find herself truly fortunate as that conveys in your marriage bro!
Ive really admired perspective of life through all its events for you. as Amanda said your positivity is amazing.
I Love your life and I really Love you!… as my Neighbor… my friend and as My big Brother D.V.D!! aka LHA.. GoodLuck and Much Love to both of you
im a Recovered man (2009)
i feel everything is base upon the perspective. so my perspective at 25 is relative to myself at 19 and 20. its more of an overbearing take mine, than a repressive get mine.
I really feel my family dealings has been hardest thing ive had to endure from thru my lifetime. especially my mom. as much as i would like to consider myself a positive person its been difficult to convey while owning and searching for console from such negative experiences. from my adolescents i still feel effects from scars i have socially emotionally mentally and definitely spiritually.
but my perspective at 25 is more of a “im scarred not cut.” i finally feel like im in motion past it. I took alota time to away in attempts to deal with all the issues i felt conflicted with my self. mainly a whole lota muthafuckin Recentment. but i feel ive rehabilitated all the pieces of myself which where short of the point of NON rehabilition (which is definitely the case in some areas). So i feel again confident in all of myself. cause all u could do as a man is, Try under God, for better were u fall short. and ive done that.
So after that im really back to not giving a fuck. im just me. and Ill Never repress myself again. im a deeper personality than that average shit. for good or bad i been HOnest TO God my whole life. so shall he be for me. but even if not im still intent on Being the best Mark Howard i could be, the Ultimate Mark Anthony Howard i can be. Be it Via Grits or whatever. .
So again shit is all perspective and at 25 I am a TYrant of Will. Just Relentless completely overbearing and i dont give a fuck.
Life is what u take
o and ps. bangin AZ sugarhill from like 94 u know im such a throwback
RealShit. apr 7, 2008
The Focus iz way too tuff for me. I cant concentrate on anything but stayin concentrated on where i wanna be for MYself. shit always been Real Life for me. and it was Hard for me sort out. but i really feel i raised myself in to a senseable person thru critique of my thought on a constant basis. So i believe in the exercise and really feel it as a comfortable zone So now even more than ever, because i feel like my Ultimate Self, and Ultimate Financial Progression(which means SOSo MUch 2 me) depends on it, I spend alota time within my thoughts. i feel like my life is on pause when i aint in a productive Frame of Thought. So RealShit. i cant even entertain an interest in whats on Bitches shallow ass head these dayz. im Just Doin what the fuck i Do. So u could fuck wit it, if u could fuck wit it, but the NonCHalant is way to muthafuckin thick for me to be concerned on a Perception Judged against me. Cause i never in my life felt my situation presentation reflected my Mental capacity (as it does in alota people. Mainly “Grown” Muthafcukaz! lol!!) but i dont think its a nigga livin more determined on transitioning, that, to such. So Im just shootin (Real)Shit at the (Bull)shit and that (Weak-Ass)shit die off gradually everyday. But Im tryna kill “shit” if u could digg that. just a fragment of where my head at. g’Z up
(I wrote this in 2007 still highly relative)
A MAN if anyTHing
on a loose frame of thought, IMA TRY and blog my lil perception of Being a Man and what I think its SUppose to Mean!
wanna hear it Here it Go…
First if there is no PRINCIPle involved there is no man. a Man is to be whomever the fuck he choose only as long as he is HONeST To Himself and in the principles at his core.
But as far as the Meaning, i think It’s “A CONSISTANT OWNERSHIP of His whole Self” that is best epitomized in the EXCEPTANCe and a BALANCE of not only his Strengh but also his FAULT. A Full Accountability For his wholeSelf . ( Muthafuckas theseDayz wont even take accountablity for they ageLol) like “This is WHo The Fuck I Am!” For the GoOd and the Bad. (Not some eZ shit to Do) But BEING A MAN IS HARD. and it takes work. Thats why only a Short few of muthafuckaS choose to be Such! <<<<>>>Because Being A Man “Iz” (iz as in action)Takin a Stand! Not only Once But CONSISTANTLY for HimSelf, His Principlez, His Beliefs, and Anything falling Under HIS HEADSHIP as well as the Accountability for each, NOT ONCE but CONSISTANTLY . and this where alot Dudes Fallout and have problems with they women.(never Me) cause i could get any Women as My Witness in sayin In-consistancy is MOST In-tolerable and frustrating of all the bullShit they havin to deal wit from niggaz. Like “if you u say u this, than just Be that shit.”(muthafuckas wanna change they mind when its convenient) but real shit “a Man is only a Man Of His Consistancies.” And At the first instant its compromised He’s compromised himself and a percentage that MANHOODwe supposed to be strivin for. yaDigg
sO just be a Man about it my Nigga whatever type of man you are or choose Take A CONSISTANT OWNErship of your Whole-self and your PRinciplez
If U could Digg it?
YOung “Grits!” OneHunit.
gShit(Get u Some muthaFUckin Principlez PlayBoy)